Thoughts On A Job Hunt

(Super kort verhaaltje dat ik eeuwen geleden heb geschreven, maar dat een beetje lijkt op een droomtoestand. Vind je vast leuk).

One morning, I awoke and the world looked like a plum pudding. Everything had a soft, gelly quality to it that was incredibly pushy for some reason. I decided to devote the day to applying for jobs. An important task that I had forsaken the preceding two days.

Not only did I decide to hunt for jobs, I also was going to make sure I would not repeat words that day. One word, ten synonyms. You get the idea.

Looking for employment is like trying to have a vision for its own sake. Like a shuttered horse; the more you peer in the blindfold the more you likely 'see' the road ahead. In other words, depending on your hoofs is a tricky business.

But remember, it was a plummed world in which I was trying to swim. Plum redefines everything. Unsubstantial things like farts all of a sudden appear as shining beacons of health. Trapped farts (those that don't come out) too have a commanding presence.

Before your mind wanders off to what you might judge to be more important issues, let me beg you: don't go. Be trapped. If only for a split second. It's the cases in which you realize that you're escapable that you can push along the urge that's strong enough to release you out of any quagmire.

I wanted to talk about trapped nerves, but it's breaking the 'rules of engagement' for this story. Let's suppose then that a repetition did the trick. A repetition released the fart into the air. Like a bird that flies for the first time.

Or so.

Anyways, fart free, I am setting out to hunt for a job.